You Are Enough, I Am Enough….Get Rid Of “IF”…..
This week, I went to the Farmer’s Market and found some wonderful fresh kale, mustard greens and spinach.
And there she was. You know her, as I am sure you have seen her many, many times over the years.
Look at her. That younger version of you. She was a mother. Her sweet little 3 year old in tow, dressed in a bright pink sun dress. I could see her pink bathing suit straps on her little shoulders under her pink sundress. Soooo cute. She had a smile bigger than she was and she started chatting with me about going to the beach with Mommy and Daddy. I smiled at her excitement and innocence. Her attractive mother smiled as she nodded to the talkative youngster. “There are for sure no secrets at our house”….I smiled again as I remembered myself at that age….my mother thought I talked non-stop until I reached high school….and then I talked some more. I was holding the mustard greens in my hands as we chatted as strangers do over an outdoor\ produce counter.
The mother was not drop dead beautiful, but still, very attractive. Her sun lightened hair piled loosely on top of her head…looking as though she just pulled it up quickly, but you know it took time to get it to look a bit messed up and casual. Her eye make-up was impeccably applied, definitely mastering the “smokey eye look” as most of the millennials have perfected. Her pouty lips were a nude pinkish color which complimented her flawless complexion. She wore a sheer, mostly white with splashes of black, cover-up that hung loosely on her body and it slid casually off one shoulder, revealing the black and white rope straps of a bathing suit. From the back, the cover-up draped to appear as if she had nothing else on but the bathing suit… as her long, tan legs met the bottom of the blouse’s hem. However, as she leaned into the table of red tomatoes…one could easily see that she had on a pair of hem-frayed jean shorts which matched the faded denim of her straw wedgie shoes. She and her little daughter were so attractive.
So perfect. In other words, one couldn’t help admiring her and her daughter for their almost model like appearance and yet they were shopping just like all the other casually dressed shoppers.
Perhaps I should explain the term “a younger version of you”. In my younger days, I wouldn’t have looked quite like that young mother at the Farmer’s Market. I couldn’t help but admire her with her pulled together look and it made me think back to when I was her age. Oh, don’t get me wrong, my little daughter would have been clean and neat in a pair of solid colored shorts and matching print shirt…..and I would most likely have been in a pair of yellow walking shorts with a tucked in matching sleeveless top and white keds on my feet. (remember them??)
I would have had my eye make-up subtle, but visible and perhaps a folded scarf tied around my short poufy hair allowing the tail of the scarf to trail down my back. But I am sure I would not have looked as great as she and her little girl on this casual day at the Farmer’s Market. But it would have been enough.
Let me explain. The great Billy Graham was a wonderful evangelist. What a great man of God he was. And he was the first to tell you that we all have a purpose in our lives and it does not include perfection. In this fast paced world we live in, we have become conditioned to perfection, and we should not be. Whatever we do, in our minds, it is never enough. As mothers and home makers as well as career women, we think we should be doing more.
We should bake more.
We should clean our homes more.
We should stay later after work more.
We should go into our jobs earlier than our regular hours.
We should apply for bigger and better paying jobs more.
We should study more.
But, my wonderful readers…..,
God made us as we are, each one of us different and with a purpose. We do have a purpose in life, but it is not reaching that pinnacle of perfection. Let’s you and me…remove this phrase from our vocabulary…
You know what I mean.
“if I would have done this…it would have been enough.”
Or…
“if I would have had a little bit more time…”
“If I would have tried harder…”
“If I would have done that differently….”
I know,…I have been there too. That is called the “almost enough” syndrome. The “almost enough” mentality needs to be removed from our thought processes. We need to quit expecting perfection of ourselves and we shouldn’t look at others with awe….because guess what?They have their own issues and in spite of appearances…they have burdens to bear too.
We ALL do. We need to think of our purpose in life and it does not include chiding ourselves with “I could have done better.” Don’t listen to that voice….it is not of God.
Romans 8:28 says “And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according go His purpose.”
God made each of us as we are…
…….If we were supposed to be thinner….we’d be.
…..If we were supposed to be richer, we’d be.
……If we were supposed to be more talented or have more gifts, we would have them.
We have all the blessings we need at our fingertips, but that ugly “almost enough” syndrome is stopping us. Everything we have inside of you and me…is complete to do what each one of us are called to do, according to His purpose. We need to love. Love each other. Love the unlovely.
Pray that God will show you your purpose. When the world tells you that you are not enough, don’t believe it. You are enough because your Creator says you are.
Psalm 139: 13-17. For You formed my inward parts; You covered me in my mother’s womb. I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Marvelous are Your works, and that my soul knows very well. My frame was not hidden from You, when I was made in secret, and skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth. Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed. And in Your book they all were written, the days fashioned for me, when as yet there were none of them. How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God! How great is the sum of them! If I should count them, they would be more in number than the sand… –
Are You Enough?
I love you too!!!!
All of you !!!!
And we are enough!
Blessings Always
This comment came from Sandy, a dear friend in KC…
Dear Kari,
This last blog I tried twice to leave a comment, but it wouldn’t allow it. I loved that blog and it made me feel so much better. I realize I must really be enough.
Thanks so much!
Love and hugs,
Sandy
Kari, what a much needed and stunning post. All of us, no matter who we are, struggle with this sometimes. Comparison is the thief of joy, God made each of us in His image, every single one. Bless you, friend, for this beautiful writing. Lidy
For more years than I can remember, I have always felt “I’m not enough.” Now, no one ever did anything to make me feel this way. I was very good at doing this all by myself. I was an only child and dearly adored by both my parents, yet I felt I wasn’t enough because — it was just me and even though my dad never gave the slightest indication that he’d like a boy, too, I decided he MUST feel that way (even though he’d spend hours playing the Barbie doll board game with me!). I put “not enough” onto myself as recently as ten or fifteen years ago and then one day I woke up and said, “You idiot, you are MORE than enough.” I may not HAVE enough (time, energy, determination) but I have what I need and work with what I have. It’s such a liberating feeling and I’m so glad you’ve written this for those who have not yet found their own “enough.”
And, thanks SO much for your wonderful comment on my blog the other day! So appreciated!
Thank you Jeanie for your kind words and you are right, sometimes we fall into that pit of not being enough. I am so glad you were able to overcome that because it can wear one down. We just need to hand off our insecurities to God and live our lives with joy. It isn’t always easy and there are pitfalls, but our ‘load’ is so much lighter when we share it. Hugs and much love always.
A wonderful reminder, Kari. It is so easy to slip into “ifs”, “shoulds” and comparisons. All of these create insecurities, fears, worries, and steal our joys. I try to reframe the negatives that pop into my mind and to encourage others, but I often fall short. Thanks for reposting.
Jan, I sometimes am drawn back to different posts…and feel the Holy Spirit. So I repost. I have been teaching my weekly Bible Study for over 5 years now and the ladies express their gratitude for these reminders. It is so encouraging when my readers agree. One who commented originally, Beve…is a pastor’s wife….wonderful lady…Beve if you are reading again…hugs and prayers to you and yours….anyway, we sometimes need to be reminded that we all need to be lifted up and encouraged just as the Apostle Paul instructs Timothy in 2 Timothy 2:1 (NLT): “Timothy, my dear son, be strong through the grace that God gives you in Christ Jesus”.
Basketball: What do you think about Stokes?
Hugs dear friend.
Kari, I somehow missed this post!Sister you are right on the mark! Comparison will steal our joy. God made us in His image and we are enough. What a beautifully written post bathed with truth!
As I was reading Nancy Sharp’s comment, I am now 72. I haven’t heard from her in a very long time. I always get concerned when readers no longer comment.
With love,
Pam
Thanks Pam…I just felt it was time to remind us that God loves us as we are…even the hairs on our head are numbered….when I lose a few hairs to my comb, I chuckle because God knows….and it is enough.
On another note, I have been concerned about Nancy too. I haven’t heard from her in a long time and she isn’t the only one. We become so close to our readers and I (like you) really care. I have prayed for Nancy’s health issues, which were many….perhaps she will chime in if she is able.
Just what I needed to hear today…the Lord knows when we need to read something! I’ve saved your posts to retrieve as time allows…so happy I did!
Thanks Bev…He always knows our needs doesn’t He? Blessings and prayers and hugs!
Thank you for that lovely message. I am trying to find my “new normal”. I am almost 72. This past year my activities have become more and more restricted because of the scar tissue in my lungs from a disease I had (Sarcoidosis) in my 40’s and 50’s. My breathing is very restricted and I use a walker now. Just an FYI. I just learned from my pulmonologist that using a walker helps from getting winded. The motion of extending your arms opens your rib cage to let more air into your lungs. I was skeptical at first but it works.
Anyway, it’s hard to feel useful at this stage. There are things I can so for me like Bible study on my own, which I love, but I still want to be useful to others too.
I DO want to do enough.
Bless your heart Nancy….you are on my prayer list.
It must be so difficult when it is so hard to breathe. So glad the walker is helping and you ARE enough for God to use. I certainly understand your need to feel useful. By the way, have you ever listened to the radio program “Insight for Living” with Chuck Swindoll? I also have the website link here…http://insight.org/ ! I really enjoy the studies he has available through his on-line library as well as his daily radio broadcast which you can listen to when it is convenient for you.
We don’t know the actual affliction the apostle Paul had, some say eyesight, which I tend to agree with from my studies…but look at how God used him. He wrote 13 books of the new testament and taught and encouraged so many as he traveled all over from Corinth to Macedonia to Ephesus….most of the time walking. Can you imagine?
God has given each of us a purpose and many times He uses the most unlikely to spread His Word.
Thank you for your comments and God Bless you.
Kari